Family Traditions

We have all been through our share of family traditions over the last few weeks. I love family traditions, cutting down our Christmas tree, annual ski day, and camping are a few of mine. As parents we hope these traditions are carried forward. This year we added tradition that my parents gave me when I was a child…it just took me a long time to apply it!

My kids have been through an emotional roller coaster over the last 6 years and in my humble opinion they are quite remarkable. Consider living through divorce, remarriages, step parents, step siblings, different homes, different rules etc.

I often wondered how I could possibly contribute to my kids having a better life than what my parents provided me, considering all the noise that surrounds their lives.

I was quite lucky to grow up in a small town, roaming the woods, alleys and riding my bike across town were just things I did. My parents love me; they prepared me for life, taught me to be responsible and respectful, and taught me about Gods love and the ultimate gift of Grace.

I can’t tell you how I fell into the trap of selfish love. Maybe it was because as a child I felt like I never got what I wanted, a bmx bike or motorcycle. Doesn’t Freud suggest all our adult issues relate back to our relationship with our parents?

Selfish love is easy. Oscar Wilde said, “Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.”

Things that make me feel good are easy to find… golf trips, drinking, sex, and money. Perusing night clubs for women was fun and exciting. Enjoying beers with friends was comfortable and made me feel accepted. Having titles and money made me feel important. Having empathy for others was not on my radar screen.

God’s love is Hard. God teaches us Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control. What we sometimes fail to understand…this is what God wants us to GIVE to others.

It takes a lot of wisdom to understand what creating a better life for our children really means and I understand it means different things to different people. For me, the focus has shifted from the material world to the spiritual world. If my job as a parent is providing a solid foundation that will support them throughout their lives… teaching Gods love is a must.